Learning to Love Rejection

“I really wish I was less of a thinking man and more of a fool not afraid of rejection.” — Billy Joel

I am a keynote speaker and author.

I am a sales professional.

I am a human.

I have an intimate relationship with rejection.

Growing up I was a sensitive kid.

I wanted everyone to like me.

Even when I played Little League baseball.

I wanted the other team to like me.

The umpires too.

If I was called out, I took it personally.

My dad, an old sailor, used to tell me I needed to have thicker skin.

He would say, “Toughen up, kid. If everyone likes you, you’re playing it safe. Stop hitting singles and start swinging for the fences.”

The older I get the smarter my father is.

He was right.

Not everyone is going to like you.

Playing it safe is not a great strategy. 

Playing it safe is choosing to be ordinary.

We weren’t created for that.

I was listening to my friend Dan Clark the other day.

Dan is a hall-of-fame speaker, author, and singer/songwriter.

He was talking about selling a million records.

Going platinum.

He said, “There are three hundred million people in this country. You can piss off two hundred and ninety-nine million of them and still have a platinum record.”

What a great perspective.

More people are going to reject your ideas than accept them.

More people will ignore you than acknowledge you.

Most people won’t give one thought about what you did, said, sang, or wrote.

So what?

Who cares?

Your truth, your voice, your ideas, and your contributions weren’t for them. 

You sing your song.

You write your book.

You paint your masterpiece.

Your audience will emerge.

They will tune into your frequency.

They will buy what you’re selling.

You don’t need to win them all.

Just the ones you are here for. 

Stop playing it safe.

Step up to the plate and swing for the fences.

Not everyone will cheer as you’re rounding third, headed for home.

But the ones who matter will.

Here are three things to focus on when it comes to handling rejection.

  1. Ignore it:  Who cares if someone doesn’t like you or want what you’re selling? Their loss. As we say in sales, NEXT! Time to move on.

  2. Be True to You: Far too many people play it safe and live their lives by comparing themselves to others. They look for what’s popular and try to fit themselves into it. The great ones blaze their own trail and go where others cannot even see a path.

  3. It’s a Numbers Game: Every rejection, every closed door, every no, gets you one step closer to victory. Most people quit when they are on the doorstep of their greatest breakthrough. Put your head down and keep striding toward home. You are almost there.

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Kevin D. Brown is a branding and culture expert. He’s an award-winning motivational speaker, bestselling author, and the creator of The Hero Effect®. Follow him on LinkedIn, Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter.

Canesha Appleton