What Are We Doing?

I was sitting around a fire pit with some buddies.

It’s one of the things I love about fall weather.

Sweatshirts, jeans, and something to sip on.

Like each time before, we were willing and ready to solve all the world’s problems.

Okay, we were willing at least.

We talked about friends who weren’t there.

We laughed at each other’s jokes.

We argued about whose team was going to win the game.

We took turns bragging about our families.

We “one-upped” each other about our aches and pains.

And once again, we laughed at the same dad jokes we had laughed at moments earlier.

It was a good night.

I needed the downtime.

I’d been on the road a lot.

Then the conversation turned to work.

There was a shift in tone and tenor.

No jokes.

We talked about the relentless stress and pressure we felt every day.

Travel struggles and the state of humanity.

The lack of kindness and compassion in the world around us.

At one point, my buddy Steve looked at the group and said, “What the hell are we doing!?”

Chad said, “I thought we were having a good time.”

Steve rolled his eyes.

“We are having a good time, knucklehead. I’m talking about the big picture.

Life, work, all of it.”

As he stood up, he repeated the question.

“What the hell are we doing?”

“We get up every single day and hit the ground running.

Still tired from the day before.

Sprinting through life checking boxes, jumping through hoops, and chasing the bottom line.”

His tone was tense.

This is something that had obviously been weighing on his mind.

He sat back down and leaned in toward the fire.

His elbows resting on his knees and his chin perched on folded hands.

He looked at each of us.

His gaze was focused.

He was serious.

One by one he asked us.

“What will linger when you leave?”

“What will they say about you when you’re gone?”

“How will you be remembered?”

Each of us tossed out an answer.

Chad said, “I want to be remembered as a good husband, dad, and granddad.”

Hank stood up, leaned on the back of his chair, and stared at the flames.

“I don’t know guys. Like Chad, I hope I was a good family man and was there for the people who mattered most.”

My turn.

I said, “I hope that I took care of the people I loved and did some good in the world.”

Steve sat quietly.

After a long pause, he took a deep breath and spoke.

“You know I love you, fellas. We’ve been through a lot together.

Weddings and babies.

Wins and losses.

But your answers are garbage.”

The three of us looked at each other.

Eyebrows raised.

Apparently, we had failed whatever test we were being given.

“So, then what the hell are we doing, Stevie!?” Chad said with a snarky edge.

Steve hates it when we call him Stevie.

Hank chimed in, “Yeah, Steve. What gives?

Everything we said are good things to strive for.

Aren’t they? I mean isn’t that what everyone wants!?”

Steve threw his arms in the air.

“That’s my point guys. It’s what everyone says they want.

Ask anyone on the planet the same questions and they will all say some variation of what the three of you did.

Those are the things we’re supposed to say, I guess,” he continued.

“I’m sorry, but those things are a baseline for a good life.

Sure, they are important and deserve to be at the top of the list.

But those things are what you signed up for in the first place.”

Steve pulled out his phone and scrolled through his notes.

He stood there for a few seconds reading something.

Then he passed his phone to Hank and said, “Read this.”

Hank studied the words.

He gave the phone to Chad as he glanced at Steve.

Chad read those same words.

He tapped his thigh with the phone before handing it to me.

I read the words on the screen.

“Read them out loud,” Steve said.

The meaning of life is to find your gift.

The purpose of life is to give it away.

It was a quote from Pablo Picasso.

The quiet around the fire pit was palpable.

It felt like an eternity before Steve broke the silence.

“Guys, I feel like I am just going through the motions.

A hamster on the wheel of life just trying to survive.

That quote from Picasso hasn’t left my mind since reading it two weeks ago.”

Pondering.

Contemplating.

Meditating.

Wondering.

“Think about it,” he said pleading his case.

“Most people, including me, are simply going through the motions.

Work hard.

Take care of our families.

Try to do good.

Get up.

Repeat.”

“There must be more to all of this than just existing,” Steve said.

He continued, “I think Picasso had it right.”

“I think we are here for a larger purpose.

To find our gifts.

To pursue big goals and dreams.

To give the best of ourselves to those around us.

To do something that leaves this world better than we found it.”

Steve was in rare form that night.

He continued.

“What if we got up every day and chased our gifts!?”

“What if we poured those gifts into our work, our relationships?”

“What if we gave our gifts to the world instead of taking them to the grave with us?”

That got everyone’s attention.

Hank held up his hand and said, “Hold up, Steve. Why are you talking about the graveyard? Is something going on with your health?"

Steve said, “Brothers, we are all dying.

Sixty is bearing down on all four of us.

None of us are getting out of here alive.”

Chad chimed in, “Way to bring the room down, Steve.”

Steve responded, “Sorry, I don’t mean to be overly dramatic, but this is real-life guys.

We have to think about it.

To answer your question, Hank, I am fine right now.

But I can’t stop thinking about my legacy.

Am I going to leave it all on the stage or take it all with me when I go?”

I raised my hand and said, “Excuse me, the stage? I thought I was the motivational speaker!”

Everyone laughed.

Steve said, “Sorry dude, didn’t mean to steal your thunder.”

“I’m kidding bud, you’re exactly right.

In fact, thank you for bringing this up.

I for one needed to hear this.

I think Chad and Hank would agree.”

I raised my glass.

“Here’s to you, Stevie!”

We toasted our pal as he gave me the “look” for calling him Stevie.

“I appreciate you guys,” Steve said.

“How about we make a pact? Let’s hold each other accountable to Picasso’s quote.”

Chad said, “Yes, we can call it Picasso’s Pact!”

Steve glanced at Chad with a sideways look and said, “Sure.”

Steve continued,

“Seriously, let’s do our best to support each other in the pursuit of our gifts and share them with the world around us.

Let’s do more than go through the motions. Let’s leave this place better than we found it.”

And with that, Steve raised his glass and said,

“I love you guys. Thank you for being in my corner.”

I couldn’t have said it better myself. I want to encourage you to think about and contemplate Picasso’s quote.

Enter each day with gratitude for your talents, gifts, and abilities and the opportunity to give them away at work, at home, and in life.

We need your gifts now more than ever.

And I for one, hope you give them away and leave this place better than you found it.

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Kevin D. Brown is a branding and culture expert. He’s an award-winning motivational speaker, bestselling author, and the creator of The Hero Effect®. Follow him on LinkedIn, Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter.